Okay I can't resist putting this out there.
Today, morning I got a call. From a relative whom I was formerly close to, but after a family fued we stopped talking for a couple of years. I got the call while I was in a meeting, and I said I would call back. I forgot to call back. He did call back in the evening and we talked and so on.
The curious thing that I am musing about is how I could have forgotten. He probably didn't believe me, and maybe thinks I am cold-shouldering him. When the breakup happened it was quite a painful thing for me. So now, on talking to him after about 2 years -- how come it slipped my mind so easily ? Its a big deal right ? Was my mind subconsciously trying to blank it out ?
1 comment:
I dont think it is that big a deal although it would have been nice if you hadnt forgotten.
The behaviour has parallels to the process of doing taxes. You make a note to do it but just dont do it because it is easy to forget. Its not in cache memory - its just stored on the hard drive which is harder to access. Cache memory is for the pleasurable. So I would attribute your behaviour to less of avoiding this person and more so to not enough pleasure/utility/happyness in the activity to be high on the list of priorities. And yes, who can blame you if you didnt have enough happyness in dealing with this person in the past.
Heres what I do when I have to remember - I delegate to Nandita and if she does it fine else I blame her. In America, its very important to have some one to blame. Ask Bush, Gonzalez etc. So for example, Nandita is doing taxes this year and I will remember on April 15th to ask her if she has mailed the taxes. Ah, the pleasure of holding somebody else accountable. Cache memory is a good place to store this.
Arvind
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